Eleven Minutes
by EarnedDisillusionment
Summary: Who knew that eleven minutes could change your entire life? Will Casey be able to change? Will Derek be able to help her? Will Casey even let him in?
1. Chapter 1

Hey everyone! I'm back. Sorry it has taken so long for me to provide another story! But here is a new one! And...it is not a one shot! It is a multi-chapter fic! Surprise! lol! Anyways, this story is really important to me because certain events are straight from my own life. I hope it doesn't seem too fake because the main motives for a lot of things in this story are based on what has happened in my life. So I hope you enjoy. I am making sure I am a few chapters ahead so I don't leave you waiting. I am not too sure how long it is going to be...but we will see! Also, even though this is based on real events, if anyone has any suggestions feel free to make them!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Life With Derek or any of the characters...if I did, we would all have our own Michael Seater :)

Eleven Minutes

_All she does is hide behind a smile. No one knows. No one can tell that the big, beaming, beautiful smile is a lie. She's not ok. She's not alright. She just hides, afraid of the world. Every smile she gives conceals the pain she feels on the inside. The laughter that rings out from her is just a cover for her screams. She knows she is broken…she knows she should ask for help. All she needs to do is ask, to let someone in; but she can't. There is a huge difference between knowing you are broken and admitting to someone else that you need help. When you've been hurt before the last thing you want to do is let someone else in; to give someone the power to hurt you. She would rather be numb then feel the hurt. They say that no man is an island…well, this woman is. _

Casey McDonald sat her computer finishing up an entry on her blog that no one knew about. She has two different blog accounts, _XOPrncssCaseyXO_ was the one that all of her friends knew about. She kept in touch with her old friends from Toronto on it; Emily and Lizzie also visited it. However, she had another account that no one knew about, _ALostEcho_. Casey used the second account to write out her feelings…all of them, no matter how strange or depressing. Recently, she was using the unknown account more and more frequently.

No one knew how hard it was on Casey, not really. Her mom and Lizzie were happy and busy with the new family. Emily, her new best friend, was wonderful but she didn't know everything that Casey had been through. Her friends from Toronto after a while lost touch with her, not that she could blame them; she was just as busy herself. Her stepfamily was nice, they made her mom and sister happy and that is really all Casey cared about. She hasn't really bonded with any of them; she still feels a little like she is a guest; a guest who goes out of her way to make everyone happy, but a guest nonetheless. She wondered if she would ever begin to feel a part of the family…

She doubted it. Casey didn't even feel like she was a part of her family before the McDonald's joined the Venturi clan. The last time she felt truly happy and whole was before, what she refers to as, the incident. Casey often questioned whether her mother had told George or any of the other Venturi's what had happened. She hoped not. She didn't want anyone to know. It was no ones business. They didn't have to deal with everything. They didn't have to give up everything. They didn't loose their childhood at the age of ten. Were they forced to take care of their parents and sibling? No.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Casey let out an exasperated scream into the pillow she grabbed that was sitting on her bed. She threw the pillow across the room. She hated when she got like this. She could feel it coming but was powerless to stop it. She was a slave to this emotional upheaval that appeared randomly throughout her life. She could always feel it building, like the pressure behind a dam that is just about to break. She could tell you roughly when it would happen, yet never pinpoint it. The pressure and thoughts would keep building until suddenly she would breakdown. Casey was lucky enough to breakdown in the solitude of her bedroom; she was talented enough to do it when everyone else was asleep, the last thing she wanted was for someone to walk in and ask her what was wrong…or worse, try to help.

Casey knew that she was going to breakdown soon…in fact; she knew when she would exactly this time. You see, while Casey could never pinpoint exactly when she would go through this silent hell, there was one time a year where she could. The anniversary of what happened. February 7th. This day was Casey's personal hell. She avoided everyone and everything. It was the one day she would allow herself to be upset in public, after all, it wasn't like her mom or Lizzie would question it. They knew exactly why she was always silent and sad on this day, it was the same reason why they were. They all dreaded this day more than any other day.

Casey was dreading it even more than before. It was the first time she was going to have to go through it living with the Venturi's.


	2. Chapter 2

Hey everyone! Thanks for the reviews...and, err...the threats! LOL! I am glad you guys are into it, hopefully you will stay interested! Well here is chapter 2. I am sorry for the shortness of the chapters, I will try to make them longer. But there are just certain spots that I need to stop on. I hope you like this chapter! Keep reviewing, it brings a smile to my face!

DISCLAIMER: Still don't own LWD...but one day...nah, I still won't own it :)

Casey stood up briskly and changed into her pajamas; she walked to the bathroom and began to wash her face and brush her teeth. After her nightly rituals were completed, she swiftly walked down the stairs and checked to make sure the doors and windows were locked and the lights were off. Casey walked to the basement door and gently opened it; she heard the sounds of two people breathing deeply. _Check. Mom and George are ok._ Casey walked upstairs and nudged Marti's door open a little wider, _another check_. She walked over to Lizzie's room and checked on her as well; following Lizzie's room she looked in on Edwin. They were all asleep; _now to look in on Derek._ Casey strode to Derek's door and quietly opened it. She knew, based on past experience that she had to physically walk into his room and up to his bed. _I wish he would just listen to me and clean his room. If he did, then I wouldn't have to walk into this sty during my rounds._ Casey walked up to Derek's bed and softly pulled the covers down from over his head. He was fine; dead asleep to the world. Casey tenderly brushed some of his hair from his face. Derek stirred and leaned into her touch. Casey smirked and walked to her room.

Casey often wondered what someone would say if they found out about her nightly ritual. She didn't know why she did it; she just did. She couldn't go to sleep if she didn't check on everyone first. Casey flicked off her light and crawled into bed, hoping that she would be able to fall quickly into a dreamless sleep.

THE NEXT DAY- Wednesday, February 6th.

"BEEP BEEP BEEP" Casey's alarm clocked shrilled next to her. Groaning, Casey slapped the snooze button and lay stationary in bed, trying to gather her wits. After the customary dowsing period of nine minutes, the clock went off again. This time Casey turned it off and got up. Grabbing her clothes and a towel, she headed off to the bathroom. Casey knew what day it was. It was the day before the anniversary. Based on past experience, Casey knew that as the day wore on she would become more withdrawn and irritable. She also knew that she would be getting no sleep tonight and would not be able to really breathe until the 9th.

Seeing the line for the bathroom, Casey just sank down on the floor, against the wall. Edwin, who was waiting for Derek to get out, glanced at Lizzie who was behind him, questioningly. It was a common fact that Casey always threw a fit when Derek was in the bathroom before her. Her tantrum was even worse when there were others in line waiting. However, today, she didn't care. Casey just sat on the floor, head against the wall and eyes closed. Lizzie shook her head at Edwin and sat down besides Casey. Lizzie leaned into Casey, who absentmindedly began to stroke her hair.

Before Edwin could ask anything, the bathroom door opened and Derek stepped out. Derek smirked at Edwin and opened his mouth to say something mean when he noticed Casey, who was holding onto Lizzie, on the floor. A very brief flash of concern passed across Derek's face; so brief that even someone who was looking at him would think it was just a weird lighting angle.

Derek grinned slyly at Casey and said, "Casey, Casey, Casey…finally on the floor where you belong." Expecting to hear a lame retort, Derek looked at her, waiting. Casey glanced up at him and before she could say anything Lizzie replied,

"Derek. Grow up. Not today, ok? Just do us a favor and leave us alone, alright? Just be a decent human being for the next few days. I know those are two very hard concepts for you…decent and human being. Just leave us alone for a few days."

With that being said, Lizzie stood up, pushed Edwin out of the way and walked into the bathroom. Everyone heard the door slam and the lock click before Edwin realized he lost his turn at the bathroom. Edwin began pounding on the door, yelling at Lizzie.

Derek looked back at Casey, who had stood up while Lizzie stormed off.


	3. Chapter 3

Hey guys! Here's another chapter! I'm so glad you like it! Keep the reviews coming!

DISCLAIMER: Again, don't own it. Wish I did. I should do something about that….Ahhh, whatever. I should, if I could; but I can't, so I won't.

"What the heck is with your sister? I thought you were the crazy one!" Derek cried. Casey gave Derek an exasperated look and just shook her head. She wished that Derek would, for once in his life, listen to someone. Before she could make this request, Derek shrugged and strutted to his room.

AT SCHOOL- Lunch

Casey sat quietly at the table, picking at her food. Emily wasn't in school today because she had a doctor's appointment. Normally, Casey would be upset at having to sit alone; however, today she was glad. As much as she loved Emily, Casey knew she wouldn't be able to listen to her obsess over Derek. Not today. She was already feeling overwhelmed and nervous about tomorrow.

Casey sighed. She knew she had to get her head together, at least until she could lock herself in her room. Casey grabbed her bag from the seat next to her; she figured she could at least attempt some homework to occupy her mind. While she was rummaging through her bag, she neglected to notice the empty seat across from her, suddenly become not so empty. Finally finding the needed supplies, Casey looked up and jumped slightly in her seat.

"What do you want Derek?"

Derek smirked at her. "What I want, Case, is some answers. Why did Lizzie go all psycho on me this morning? Why did Nora just give me money to buy lunch, instead of making me take one of 'nutritious' meals? And why are you so out of it? Seriously, you haven't screamed out my name in unusually stretched syllables all day. Not that I miss it or anything, but it usually happens like every three minutes."

During Derek's little rant, Case held her breath. She didn't realize Derek noticed those things. She didn't even notice that the McDonald women were acting odd. It made her uneasy to thing that someone noticed, and everyone knows that when Casey got uneasy, she became defensive.

Casey narrowed her eyes at Derek. "Derek, why the hell do you even care? You haven't made any effort to welcome us into your life or your home. Now that something that you deem 'strange' is going on, you become concerned for our welfare? I don't buy it. I don't care. There is so much that you don't know about me; so much about my family. So just drop it. Stop acting like you care for anyone besides yourself. Just leave me alone." With this, Casey stood and grabbed her stuff. Swiftly turning around, she strode out of the cafeteria.

Derek sat there shocked. Normally, Casey yelled at him, loudly. This time; however, her voice barely reached the normal speaking level. Casey looked so angry. Derek didn't understand. _I didn't even do anything this time!_


	4. Chapter 4

Hey you all! Again, thank you so much for the reviews. It seriously makes writing this worth it. It's kinda hard for me to write this, I feel like I am taking sections from my journal and putting it out there for the world to see and judge…it's scary.

If it seems like what Casey is feeling is totally not real; it is. I'm simply describing how I've felt when it comes to this event (which, I promise, will be revealed soon). It feels like you are loosing control and there is nothing you can do to stop it. I hope I am conveying how she feels. Let me know, because it's hard for me to put something so personal into a fanfiction.

Anyways, hope you like it :) Thank you again for all the reviews, threats, and bribes! Lol.

DISCLAIMER: Still don't own LWD :(

LATER THAT NIGHT- JUST BEFORE DINNER

Casey was sitting on her window seat, looking out at the darkening sky. It was going to rain. She was glad. Her room was dark, lit only by various candles placed around the room. Casey was starting to feel it coming. She could almost see the sadness and pain slowly glide towards her, like a black fog. The tendrils were reaching up to grab her and pull her down. Casey felt her breath catch; she knew she should fight it, but she decided to just give in. She was going to sink into the black abyss for one day and one day only.

Leaning her head back against the wall in surrender, she let out a breath. She felt like she was standing on the edge of a ravine, looking down, preparing to lean and gracefully fall. Before she could fall into the pain, a knock sounded on her door.

"Casey," her mom, Nora, asked tentatively, pushing open the door. "Casey, honey, dinner is ready. Do you feel like eating?"

Casey looked at her mom; she was vaguely surprised at her mother's appearance. Nora looked upset; yet, she didn't look as upset as she usually was during this difficult time of year. Nora normally looked like death, to be honest, during these three days a year. Her skin was always pale; her face drawn. Her eyes were always tired and bloodshot. However, this year was different. Nora looked upset, yet there was still some thing akin to contentment shinning through her eyes; her cheeks were only slightly less rosy than they usually are the rest of the year. To put it simply, Nora didn't look as sad as she usually does.

Casey didn't know whether to envy her mother for moving on; or be furious that she isn't broken like Casey herself is. Casey quietly stared at her mother; who was silently begging her to come to dinner and act normally. Casey acquiesced to her request and stood, quietly following her mother down the stairs. Once she reached the bottom of the stairs, her mother turned to her.

"Sweetie, are you alright?"

Casey looked at her mom with such disdain. _Did she really need to ask that question? As my mother, shouldn't she know I am definitely NOT alright?_ Casey just stared at her mom, not even bothering to dignify the question with a response. Nora watched as Casey turned around and walked into the kitchen.

Casey had just walked through the kitchen door when she came to a dead stop. There, across the room, was Lizzie. Smiling. Laughing. Lizzie looked happy! Casey didn't know what to do. Lizzie shouldn't be looking happy; not when tomorrow was, well…tomorrow! Lizzie, laughing at something Edwin had said, glanced up. Her smile froze on her face; guilt came crashing over her. Lizzie looked at Casey, pleading with her eyes to understand. Casey said nothing and sat in her seat. _This is going to be a long dinner._


	5. Chapter 5

Hey guys! Here's another chapter! Sorry it took so long, I got slammed with homework and a paper! They really know how to pile it on in college, lol. So this is not the big reveal, I know you are probably hating that! But as much as you hate it, I love the reviews that much! They are truly amazing! Keep them coming!

DISCLAIMER: Don't own LWD. So don't ask for it :)

P.S….This is kinda a cliffie!

LATER THAT NIGHT- CASEY'S ROOM

Casey was again sitting on her window seat, with candles lit. Except this time instead of looking out the window; she was watching the clock tick.

11:57 P.M.

She shivered. She didn't know if it was because of the time or if it was because she was wearing a small tank-top and a pair of sweatpants (the shirt hardly being appropriate for leaning against a window in the beginning of February). Casey was cold. She knew that pretty soon she was going to lose it. It wasn't worth it, trying to hold it together.

11:58 P.M.

Casey didn't know what her mother and Lizzie were feeling. This morning Lizzie was freaking out like she usually did. Her mom was also out of it. However, as the day wore on they seemed to forget their sorrow; the exact opposite of Casey. _How could they just ignore it? How could they forget? Do they not care anymore? Are they so happy with their new life and new family that they forget the old one?_

11:59 P.M.

Casey could feel her breath quicken and become shallow. She closed her eyes and tried to focus on breathing; focus on getting oxygen into her body. Casey tensed up and pulled her legs in. Putting her head down, she held her eyes closed tightly; clamping her lips together into a tight line, trying to stop them from shaking. Casey's whole body began to shake uncontrollably. Her hair fell out of the loose bun it was in. Casey lifted her head and ran her hands through her hair; what was normally a calming gesture soon became violent as she latched onto her hair. She began pulling and holding on, almost as if she let go she would fall into oblivion. She felt tears slide down her face.

12:00 A.M.

February 7th. It was here. The anniversary. The event that changed her life; that one thing made her who she was today. The single thing that defines her existence, it was here.


	6. Chapter 6

Hey guys! School has been so hectic lately, sorry! Thanks so much for the reviews, they mean a lot to me. It's pretty difficult writing this, so to know people are liking it is just phenomenal! So once again I am bringing you closer to what the incident is...without telling you! I have to admit, I'm having some fun hinting at it without telling. I know, I know...I'm twisted :) And if I was reading this story, I would be so mad and want to throw stones. Anyways, I hope you like this chapter.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own LWD...stop reminding me!

P.S. For all those Buffy fans, I just recently watched Becoming Parts 1 and 2...I've seen them both countless of times, yet I still cry EVERY TIME! Ahh, the brilliance that is Joss! And David and Sarah!

Casey let go of her hair, still breathing shallowly. She stood up and swayed, light headed. Walking to the bed, she knelt at the side and pulled out a locked trunk from underneath. Spinning the combination, she opened it. Pulling out an old faded sweatshirt she buried her face within it. Sobbing, she rocked back and forth, clutching the faded sweatshirt for dear life.

Casey slumped over, her head lying on the floor near the trunk. She reached up to pull something else out of the trunk and accidentally overturned it. Pictures and little mementos scattered around her. With her head still resting on the sweatshirt, Casey semi-blindly reached around her. Her hand enclosed around a picture in a plain, black frame. Casey pulled the picture to her, clutching it close to her chest, tears still falling freely from her red face.

She looked down at the tear-stained photograph. Running her fingers gently over the smiling face, she whispered "Daddy." Casey pulled the frame back towards her, the sharp sides digging painfully into her, she didn't care; she welcomed the hurt. Curled up in a ball, her head on a sweatshirt, a black picture frame clutched to her chest, Case McDonald cried. She cried for everything she had lost, for every pain she had suffered, every hateful word whispered. She sobbed for what she had to give up, for all the hard decisions, for the childhood that was ripped from her. She cried for the girl she used to be, for the side effects of eleven minutes. Eleven measly minutes. She cried herself into a light and fitful sleep there on her bedroom floor.

FEBRUARY 7th - 7:00 AM

Derek managed to blindly make his way to the door without seriously injuring himself. Walking to the bathroom door, he reached out and turned the handle. When it actually turned, he finally opened his eyes. Casey wasn't in the bathroom. It was free. This never really happens.

"She probably got up early, the freak." Derek said to himself. Entering the bathroom, Derek enjoyed a leisurely shower, no thoughts of Casey popping into his head.

FEBRURAY 7TH- 7:45 A.M.

Derek whistled as he wandered into the kitchen to grab some breakfast. Now normally Derek would walk in the kitchen and Nora would be making eggs, Casey would be quadruple-checking her homework, Lizzie and Edwin would be talking about whatever new study was going on, and Dad would be trying to convince Martie to put on clean clothes. Today, however, was not the case. Lizzie was sitting at the table, playing with her cereal, while Edwin looked at her with concern. Nora was standing at the island, not doing anything, looking lost in thought; Dad was looking at her and rubbing her back. Martie was under the table, drinking milk out of a bowl.

Derek looked around for Casey; she wasn't there. Looking up again, Derek frowned. "Where's Casey?" He asked. Everyone looked up; unaware that he had entered the room. Edwin gave Derek a weird look, _Derek never asks where Casey is. _Derek shrugged and grabbed a box of cereal.

While Derek was pouring a bowl of cereal, sounds were suddenly heard from the stairwell. Casey walked into the room; her appearance surprised everyone. Nora and Lizzie were surprised to see her, as she never comes out of her room on this day. The Venturi's, on the other hand were surprised at Casey's appearance. Her normally perfectly in place hair was thrown up in a messy bun and instead of her normal school clothes she was wearing a pair of loose jeans, a tank top, and a raggedy flannel button down shirt. Casey never looked this sluggish on a school day (or even on weekends).

Lizzie and Nora looked at each other quickly while Casey reached for a bottle of water. "Casey, honey, what are you doing? You know you don't have to go to school today…" Nora gently addressed her eldest daughter.

"What? Why? I don't want to go to school either. I think Casey should have someone stay home and take care of her, in her hour of need. I will sacrifice my day filled with learning and stimulation to tend to her." Derek said, to no avail as no one was listening to him.

Casey looked up for the first time that morning, and even Derek wouldn't have said anything else. Her eyes were red and puffy, her skin was pale and taunt. However, the most startling thing was the emptiness. Casey always had some sparkle in her eyes, but not today. She looked vacant.

Nora was not surprised by this, although it did (as it always has) freak her out a little bit. "Casey, go back upstairs and back to bed."

Casey narrowed her eyes and glared at her mother. Nora took a step back; Casey had never exuded that much hatred at her before. Before Nora could open her mouth, Casey replied.

"Oh no, Mother. I'm fine. I'm going to school. I mean, after all, it has been years, right? Time to move on. Let it all go. You and Lizzie did, right? I mean, you don't give a shit anymore about what happened. You have your new life. I need to embrace mine too. I'm fine. I'll be home later." With that, Casey turned and walked out the door.

The reaction to Casey's outburst was as different as the reaction to her outfit. Nora and Lizzie looked at each other, guilt and concern evident on both their faces. Marti was quiet, looking around at everyone, trying to gather clues on what she should do. Edwin and George were looking at Lizzie and Nora, respectively, in confusion. Derek, meanwhile, had no idea what was going on; he kept looking around in disbelief. Before anyone could say anything, Derek turned on his heel and walked out the door.


	7. Chapter 7

Hey you guys! Sorry this is short, I just haven't had time to write that much and I couldn't add more with what I had written. I figured a rather short update would be better than no update at all :) Thank you so much for all the reviews! Keep them coming!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own LWD or it's characters :( Sad, no?

OUTSIDE- A FEW BLOCKS FROM THE HOUSE

"Casey! Hey, Casey!" Derek yelled, jogging trying to catch up with her. Casey; however, was not stopping at all; her steps remained quick and long, arms pumping at her side. Derek gave a final burst of speed and caught up with her; reaching out he grabbed her shoulder and turned her around.

"What is your damage?" Casey said angrily.

Derek's eyes widened, if Casey wasn't so angry she would laugh. Bringing his hands up to his chest he asked, "My damage? My damage? What the hell, Casey? I don't have a damage; I'm a damage-free zone. You, on the other hand, are the one full of damage! What was up with that little outburst back there?"

Casey shook her head. "Isn't this similar to a conversation we've already had? Newsflash, Derek, you don't know me. You have no idea what I have been through or who I am. So back the hell off." Casey went to turn and Derek grabbed her arm. He pulled her to him, a little harder than he meant to, and Casey stumbled into him.

"So why don't you tell me, Case? Share whatever this thing is. Let me know what is going on. You're bottling everything up and taking it out on everyone. You say I don't know you, but I do. I-"

Casey yanked her arm away from Derek and stepped back. "We already went over this, pay attention! You don't know. You never have and you never will. I have a secret, congratulations, you've discovered that much. You're all with the knowledge. But here's the thing, it's my secret. Mine. As in not yours. Now if you will excuse me, I have to go."

Casey whirled around and walked in the opposite direction from school, back towards the house. Derek had a feeling his stepsister was not going back home. Derek didn't know whether to follow her or go on to school. Sighing, Derek turned his back on the rapidly disappearing Casey and walked to school.


	8. Chapter 8

Hey guys! Thanks so much for the reviews! Here is another chapter...I promise, the incident will be revealed soon. Please continue reading and reviewing, I love having my email pop up and saying I have a new review or someone added this to their alerts! So enjoy, review, and I will update soon!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own LWD or the characters...just the plot, unfortunately.

AFTER SCHOOL: HOME

Derek walked in the house and slammed the door. He was in a bad mood because all day Emily pestered him over where Casey was. _How the hell_ _was he supposed to know? He wasn't her keeper_. Walking into the kitchen, Derek saw Nora holding Lizzie, looking perturbed.

Nora looked up at the sound of the door opening, she gently let go of Lizzie, though still keeping her close to her side. "Derek, how was school? Where's Casey?""

Derek blinked. "What do you mean, where's Casey? She never went to school; she turned and walked back towards the house this morning. She was pissed at me."

Nora and Lizzie looked at each other. Derek, once again, felt out of the loop. He hated not knowing what was going on...and there was something big going on with the McDonalds, and he was going to find out what.

LATER: JUST AFTER DINNER

"Nora, honey, are you sure you have no idea where Casey is? Are you sure she's alright?" George asked his wife, while drying dishes in the kitchen.

Nora sighed and replied, "I've learned on this day to let Casey do what she needs to do. Trying to stop her or make her talk about it just hurts her more. She's been through so much, we all have…I just let her come and go as she pleases today. Although, normally, she doesn't come or go; she just locks herself in her room. I don't think she realized that I told you everything that happened. I think she was considering it a McDonald family secret."

At this George looked up. "What do you mean? Is she ashamed of what happened? Is she ashamed of Dennis?"

Nora quickly said, "No. She's not ashamed. I think it just hurts her too much to talk about. She won't even talk about it with me or Lizzie. I bet she hasn't even told Paul, and you know how much she talks to Paul."

"Don't you think you should make her talk about it? After all, didn't you feel better after you told me about it? It isn't healthy to bottle things up, Casey should know this. She should know that she can always come to you or Lizzie or even me. I know I'm not her father, I would never dream of trying to replace Dennis. I've just grown to love her as a daughter. I'm concerned for her."

Nora wiped her wet hands on a towel and then wrapped her arms around her husband's neck. "I know, Georgie. And I love you for that. Casey is such a strong girl, 362 days out of the year no one would guess she harbors such a secret. I think I can give her 3 days to be weak without my interference. Trust me; if you push her, she lashes out. She'll be fine. She'll snap out of it by the weekend."

Unbeknownst to George and Nora, Derek stepped away from the kitchen door with a frown on his face. He had come down to get something to drink, but had stopped to hear what his dad and Nora were talking about. Once he realized it was about Casey, who never showed up for dinner, he was hoping for answers to his questions. All eavesdropping had earned him were more questions. Before Derek could walk into the kitchen, he heard a noise behind him. Turning around, he noticed Casey. The first thing he noticed about her is how pale she looked. That's when he realized. It was February. She had been outside almost all day with a thin flannel shirt on over a tank top. _She must be freezing._ Derek walked towards her, when she heard his footsteps, she looked up. Her lips were tinged with blue. Without saying anything, Derek took his hoodie off and shoved it over Casey's head, gently pulling her arms through the sleeves. He put an arm around her shoulder and propelled her upstairs; he unconsciously trailed his fingers over the ends of her hair while he walked her. He tried to pull her into his room, yet she wouldn't go. Derek walked Casey into her room and gently pushed her on the bed. Turning around he walked downstairs.


	9. Chapter 9

Again, a shortish update. Again, no reveal. But it's close. I promise :) It really is. I hope you like this. Thanks for all the reviews, they mean the world to me. Please review and please enjoy!

DISCLAIMER: Putting this every time upsets me...but I don't own LWD. Stop reminding me, lol

Fifteen minutes later, Derek returned to Casey's room with a large mug of hot chocolate.

"Here you go, Casey. Hot chocolate with a hint of cinnamon and some whipped cream." Derek said, handing Casey the mug. He really hoped it would make her respond; she still looked empty and broken.

Casey lifted an eyebrow at this. "Since when do you know how I like my hot chocolate, Derek?"

Derek blanched, caught off guard. Regaining his composure quickly, he replied "Why, Casey, I know you. You're an open book. I can read you with my eyes closed." Derek was hoping this would get her to show some sign of emotion, unfortunately it didn't work.

Casey just stared at him, color slowly coming into her pale face. Life, however, was not returning to her eyes. Casey was facing Derek, yet she was looking somewhere else. She was looking inside herself, and she obviously wasn't observing anything that made her happy. Derek stood watching Casey, not saying anything, just watching. He watched as she forgot he was there, too involved in her inner world. Derek watched her and came to a realization. Casey looked like she was empty, anyone looking at her would agree. However, if someone knew Casey, knew how her emotions played upon her face, they would realize she was far from vacant. Derek watched with a new perspective; he saw subtle emotions flicker across her face and in her eyes. Pain. Sorrow. Loss. Confusion. Guilt, an extraordinary amount of guilt. Derek felt as if a brick had hit him in the stomach. _What could make her feel this bad? I don't know how to deal with this. _Derek had no idea what to do, so he did the only thing he knew how to do; he acted like a jerk.

Derek reached over and shoved Casey's shoulder. Casey snapped out of her internal reverie and looked up at Derek.

"Casey, what is your problem? What can possibly be so wrong in your life that you are lashing out at your mom and sister? You skipped school! You, the grade-grubber! What could possibly make Miss-Better-Than-Thou do that?"

Casey just stood up and turned her back to him. She went to her desk and pulled open a little box. Casey grabbed a lighter and began to light the various candles around her room. Walking back to her desk, she put the lighter back; when she turned around she jumped a little, almost as if she had forgotten Derek was there. "Derek, if you don't mind, I need to be alone right now. So…" Casey said, while motioning towards the door.

Derek was frustrated; he was so used to getting what he wanted and knowing everything that happened in his house. Derek walked up and put his hands on Casey's shoulders. Derek shook her, to turn her attention to him. Stepping closer to Casey, Derek looked Casey square in the eyes.

"Casey. What's wrong? Tell me."

Casey narrowed her eyes and roughly replied, "Leave, Derek. Get out." With that, Casey shoved him backwards with all her might. Derek stumbled back and hit the side of her bed. Derek's force caused the entire bed to shift, revealing Casey's trunk underneath. Derek noticed the trunk; he looked up at Casey who had stilled, she hadn't locked it back up, the latch was hanging loosely. Her eyes widened and her face had lost what little color it had. Looking between the trunk and Casey, Derek made a decision; he reached for the trunk.


	10. Chapter 10

Hey everyone! I had a good day today, full of good news. I got the job I applied for and my friends had all kinds of good news, I have decided to update again. And a rather long one. I think this is the longest update...but I am not sure. Anyways, this chapter has a clue about the reveal..anyone who catches it gets a cookie! Also, I am working on the reveal scene right now, so it will definetly be soon!

So before the disclaimer and the story, I have a favor to ask of you all. I love the reviews, seriously! Hearing that little bing telling me I have a new email is amazing! Anyways, I have a few questions for you guys. What do you think are the strongest aspects of the story? What are the weakest? Can you understand and identify with what Casey is feeling? Because all the feelings are based on feelings I've felt regarding this matter and I am trying to put them into words and I don't know how good of a job I am doing. So I want to get a feel on what you all are thinking. So if you could just let me know, that would be phenomenal!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own LWD...though every night I hang out with Michael Seater in my dreams :)

As Derek's hand reached for the trunk, Casey snapped into action. She raced to the trunk and attempted to get it out of Derek's reach. Derek saw Casey coming out of the corner of his eye; he pulled the trunk to him. Casey threw herself on top of Derek, still scrambling to get the trunk away from him. Derek shoved Casey away, never letting go of the trunk. Casey managed to grab one of Derek's hands and pull it away from the trunk.

"Derek, stop it!" Casey screamed. Derek didn't listen and struggled to pull the trunk away. All the commotion over the trunk caused it to open and spill the contents over the floor. The upset made the squabbling duo pause. Casey recoiled back, scrambling to get to wall. Pulling her legs up to her chin, she put her hands on either side of her head. Her fists clutching her hair, tears fell from her eyes while she rocked back and forth. Derek looked at her, wanting to go gather her in his arms…but the mystery of the trunk was too great. Looking at the mess on the floor, Derek gently sifted through the snapshots and other memorabilia. He picked up a small stuffed animal and a faded sweatshirt. Derek moved these to the side and focused his attentions on the photos. They were all of a tall man with medium colored hair, the color of Lizzie's, blue eyes and a wide smile. Casey's eyes and Casey's smile. Even an idiot would be able to tell this man was Casey's and Lizzie's biological father. Although the McDonalds never really talked about him, Derek recognized him from the similarities between him and Casey and Lizzie. Some of the photographs had younger versions of Nora, Lizzie, or Casey in them. There were a few family pictures. Derek saw a picture of the man; he knew his name was Dennis, with a toddler Casey. Dennis had Casey in his arms, cheek to cheek, each with the same wide smile plastered on their faces.

Continuing to look in the memorabilia, Derek came across a couple of strange things, a cut hospital bracelet, a receipt for a plane ticket, a funeral program. Looking up from the last one, Derek looked to Casey who was still curled into herself, crying silently. Derek picked up the black tear-stained frame with a picture of Dennis in it. He studied it and stood up. Derek walked over to Casey, still holding the picture, and knelt down next to the silently sobbing girl. Putting the picture on the ground next to Casey, Derek put his hand on her shoulder.

"Case, what happened with your dad?"

Casey retreated even further within herself, if that was possible. She scooted closer to the wall, pulling her legs even closer to her chest. Casey shut her eyes tightly, as if not seeing it made it go away. She focused on her breathing, in…out…in…out. Casey had to concentrate on breathing, for if she didn't she would surely stop.

Derek tightened his grip on her shoulder. "Whatever happened, Casey, can't be that bad. It will be ok. I will fix it. Just tell me what happened." All of the sudden, Casey became quiet and deathly still. Her hand raised up to Derek's and lifted his hand off her shoulder. Casey's eyes opened and Derek leaned back. He had never seen such anger before, not in Casey, not in anyone. Casey rose gracefully from the floor and took a step towards Derek, who was still kneeling on the floor. Derek shakily stood up, his eyes never leaving Casey's face.

"You're going to make it _ok_? You are going to fix it? You have no idea of what is wrong Derek! You have no clue to how stupid you sound, promising it is going to be ok. What's next? You are going to tell me that one day I'll have a happy ending with a charming prince? That cartoon animals are going to help me get ready for my wedding day? That world peace is only a hug away? Get a clue Derek! The world isn't perfect. You can't make it ok. I'm not Marti; I don't think _Smerek_ is going to save me from the monsters. Yes, Derek. Monsters. Too-smart-to-believe-in-monsters-Casey is admitting that there are in fact monsters in the world. I believe people commonly refer to them as doctors. You know the ones I mean. The people you are supposed to trust besides your family; family who inevitably let you down just like doctors. You can't trust anyone. You especially can't count on anyone who says they love you and that they want to be there for you and make it better. Things don't get better!"

During this rant, Casey was pacing around her room. She had picked up the framed photograph of her father and was gripping it with one hand as if she would drown without it. Her face was getting red as her voice rose.

Derek just stared at her, unsure of what the hell she was talking about. "Casey. Just tell me what is wrong. I will make it better, you can trust me. I mean-"

"God, Derek! Do you not listen? Does anything anyone says penetrate that thick head of yours? I just said that you can't trust anyone who makes those outrageous claims, pay attention. You have no idea-" Casey was screaming and waving her hands around, the photograph of her father slipped out of her hand and crashed against the wall; glass shattered all over the floor, Derek acting quickly grabbed Casey and pulled her too him, shoving her head down so he could cover her from the glass.

Once the glass had all fallen, Casey pushed away from Derek. She stood looking at him, her chest heaving. The two just stood there not saying a word. Suddenly the door flew open, revealing George, Nora, Lizzie, Edwin, and Marti. Neither Derek nor Casey even noticed the family standing in the open door. Eye contact between the two didn't break until George spoke.

"What the heck happened?"


	11. Chapter 11

Thank you to everyone who reviewed and especially to those who answered my questions! Cookies to all! lol. I guess I am doing something right :) Well here is the next chapter, not the reveal...but I promise chapter 12 will have it. Please keep reviewing, it makes me happy! Writing the reveal was harder than I thought it would be. I keep having to stop and work through things in my head before I continue to write it. But the next chapter will have it. Have fun with this one, let me know what you think!

DISCLAIMER: Don't own LWD

Derek and Casey both jumped, visibly startled. Nora looked at her heavily breathing daughter and then she eyed the mess on the floor from the overturned trunk. Nora's eyes widened and she looked at Lizzie. Lizzie looked from the trunk's contents to her mother to her sister. Edwin just looked at the trunk and Lizzie, confusion and concern evident in his face. He held Marti close to him, unsure of what was going on.

Nora walked towards Casey. Casey saw her mother coming close and flinched. Casey backed away and said one word, "Don't." Nora stopped and looked at her daughter, puzzlement etched upon her brow.

Casey put her hand up in a stop signal. She closed her eyes, shook her head and bit her lip. "Stop. Don't. Don't come and tell me that it will be ok. Don't tell me that I am allowed to be upset. I don't give a damn if I am allowed or not allowed. I am. You pretending to understand what I am feeling is not what I need. I don't need you to hold me and patronize me. You have obviously gotten over it and are happy with your new life. That's great. I'm happy for you, I am. But don't you dare try and tell me you are still grieving. That you miss him. That you miss the way we used to be, because you don't. You don't care anymore. You don't care that he's gone. You don't care that I'm broken. That I can't do this alone. I can't do this anymore. It hurts to breathe. Why did this have to happen?" Casey began to sob, really sob. She cried as if she could not stop, and honestly she couldn't. Casey fell to the floor. Nora and Lizzie both went to Casey; however, before they could gather her in their arms, Derek reached her. Derek pulled Casey to him, holding her while she sobbed. Nora put her arms around Casey and Lizzie laid her hands on Casey's legs. Casey grasped at Derek's shirt, grasping it in her hand as tears soaked it. Casey continued to sob and speak at the same time; it was becoming hard to understand her through the cries.

"I can't breathe mom, I can't. It hurts. It hurts so much. I keep trying and trying to be good in hopes that I will wake up and everything that has happened would be a dream. I can't cry mom; I can't. I can only cry on this day. Every other day of the year I can't. I'm so afraid that once I start I won't be able to stop. It feels like someone is plunging their hand in my chest and pulling out my heart. Why did he do it? Why did he go away? Why, mom? Please. Make it better. Fix it. I keep waiting for him to come home. I know he's gone. I know it, but I feel like a little girl just waiting for him to come home. To make it better. To make me not broken. Why, mommy? Why did it happen? Was it me? Was I not good enough? I tried, oh god, I tried. I still try. I keep telling myself if I get that A, if I do the best I can and if I'm perfect, he'll come home. Where is he? Why did he leave? I'm trying. I am. It just hurts so much, mom, it hurts. Make it stop. Why won't it stop hurting?"

Casey continued to cry and grasp onto Derek's shirt. She just sobbed and sobbed. Derek tightened his arms around the girl, afraid that she was going to hyperventilate. Nora stroked her daughter's back, wondering how her life got to be such a mess. Lizzie places her head in her mother's lap, never letting her hand stray from her older sister. During Casey's breakdown, George had picked up Marti and pulled Edwin close to his side.

"Daddy, why is Casey crying? Make her better. I don't want Casey to cry. Daddy, help her. Smerek's trying. He's giving her a hug, why is she crying? Smerek always makes me feel better." Marti whispered to George, burying her face in his neck. George took Marti and Edwin downstairs to try and distract them.

Casey continued to cry, oblivious to everyone and anything but the hurt she felt inside. Her breathing was ragged and fast as tears continued to run down her face and soak Derek's shirt. Eventually after what seemed like forever, in reality was about an hour and a half to two hours, she slowly quieted down and fell asleep from exhaustion. Derek felt her drift off, still in his arms. He nodded at Nora and Lizzie to stand up and step back. Derek shifted Casey around and picked her up. He looked at Nora who hurried to pull Casey's bedspread down. Derek gently laid Casey down and pulled the blanket over her. He brushed the remaining tears away from her flushed and hot face. Turning around, he followed Nora and Lizzie out to the hallway and down the stairs.

Marti was asleep on the couch; Edwin and George were standing at the bottom of the stairs. Nora and Lizzie led the Venturi men into the kitchen. Once they were all in the kitchen, Derek turned to Nora and Lizzie. His face was more determined and serious than they had ever seen; gone was the sparkling mischief that was always in his eyes and the smirk that always seemed to adorn his lips.

"I want to know what the hell is going on. And I want to know right now." Derek said firmly, his tone allowing no excuses.


	12. Chapter 12

Hey you guys. So here is the big chapter. It was very difficult for me to write. I hope it's not confusing, if it is just let me know and I can try and clear some things up. So, I don't have much to say because I hope the chapter speaks for itself. Just please, let me know what you think and/or feel.

DISCLAIMER: Don't own LWD.

Nora and Lizzie looked at each other, fear and worry in their eyes. George walked over to Nora and drew her to him, wrapping his arms around her tightly. Lizzie stood looking lost until Nora and George drew her to them as well. George looked down into Nora's pale face and said, "Nora, honey, I think it's time you tell them." Nora gazed at her two stepsons and sighed, "Alright. I guess they should know."

George nodded towards the kitchen table and walked Nora and Lizzie to the table. The three Venturi men and the two McDonald women each sat down. No one said anything at first; then Nora began.

"This is so hard. I don't even know where to begin. Ok, well…you boys know how your father and I told you we met on a blind date?"

Derek and Edwin nodded, not understanding what this had to do with Dennis McDonald or why Casey had a breakdown. Before either could voice their confusion, a voice sounded from behind them.

"It was a check-up, a routine check-up. Nothing was supposed to be wrong."

Everyone turned towards the voice and saw Casey sitting on the stairs, wearing her dad's sweatshirt, looking dwarfed in the large sweatshirt.

Derek stood up and walked over to her. He sat down on the step and put his arm around her.

"Case, what are you doing up? You should be in bed." Derek said, tightening his arm around the girl. Casey glanced at Derek before looking towards her mom and sister. Nora looked as if she wanted to stand up and go to Casey, but she didn't. Nora watched as her oldest daughter and her eldest stepson sat side by side on the steps; Casey was looking at Nora and Derek was staring at Casey. Shrugging out from under Derek's arm, Casey stood and walked to the table; she pulled the chair farthest from her mother and her sister. Casey sat down and crossed her arms across her chest.

"I guess it's share time. Let's get this over with."

Nora and Lizzie glanced at each other, each unsure how to react to Casey. Nora cleared her throat.

"Well, uh, ok…your father and I met when I came to his office, looking to hire him for a case. You see, my first husband was in an accident-"

"Mother, don't lie. If we are going to share our history, let it at least be true," Casey interrupted. Casey looked at her mom before turning towards Derek and Edwin.

"A few years ago my father went in for a routine check-up. He wasn't sick or anything; they weren't supposed to find anything, but they did. My father had something called an arrhythmia, which is an irregular heart beat. Now many people can live with arrhythmias and not experience any major negative symptoms. The type my father had was not that kind. It needed to be fixed, and the only way to do this was with surgery. For the surgery, they needed to go in and burn a spot in the heart. It's hard to explain how it would help, but it would fix the arrhythmia. So my parents looked all around to find a competent doctor, finally, they found one, or so they thought."

Casey looked down, uncrossing her arms and clasping her hands together on the table. Staring at her hands, she continued.

"This doctor, however, was more concerned with making money than with the safety of my father. For insurance reasons, the surgery had to be practiced at least 3 times. It wasn't. The doctor kept going in without mapping out where he was supposed. He went in 3 different times, each time burning the wrong spot. The last time, they messed up. Dad ended up needing emergency open heart surgery. The doctor burned a hole all the way through his heart. His heart stopped for eleven minutes. Now you know when your heart stops, no blood is pumped through your body. The eleven minutes without oxygenated blood resulted in brain damage."

Casey's fingers were turning white from how tightly her hands were clasped. Derek saw this and reached out to put his hand over Casey's. Casey jerked her hands away, as if burned. She gave Derek a weak smile and looked at George.

George cleared his throat and began to tell the next part. "This is close to where I come in. Dennis ended up being revived, although he was clinically dead for eleven minutes. After a few months in the hospital, they released him and he began to see a neuropsychiatrist. To make a long story short and less difficult, the neuropsychiatrist and the doctor who performed the botched surgery knew each other personally. They schemed to keep Dennis drugged up for at least two years, to avoid a malpractice suit. See, to file a law suit for medical malpractice, it has to be filed within two years of the incident. Nora had thought it was odd that Dennis was given all these different types of drugs for symptoms that he didn't have. So she came to me, looking to see if I had any advice to what she should do. I immediately took the case, because I could see that there was something going on that we didn't know. Ultimately it was found that the main doctor didn't practice the required number of times, even though he claimed to. In fact, the doctor allowed someone else to practice on Dennis, like he was a human guinea pig. Nora was not informed that he had messed up the previous times, she was just told that there were more places that needed to be looked at."

George looked at Nora and Lizzie, who each had tears quietly falling down their cheeks. He glanced at Casey, who wasn't showing any emotion. She was a blank canvas again.

Looking at his sons, he saw that they were pale and angry, Derek especially. George cleared his throat and continued.

"To summarize, Dennis had 3 botched surgeries, the last resulting in brain damage. I found files that had been changed and more evidence that showed that the doctors were trying to cover up what they had done. I thought that this would be enough to win the case. Not that winning would give Nora and the girls Dennis back the way he was. He could function, but he wasn't the same-"

Casey interrupted George here. "No, he wasn't; before he was spontaneous and able to handle so many different things. After the accident he barely spoke to us, he became flustered if too many things were occurring at once. He couldn't drive at night or see movies with flashes or be in photographs because the flashes of lights sent him into seizures. Before what happened he was in charge, he took command of any situation and no one cared. He was charismatic and loved. After, he just sat there and got angry whenever he couldn't do something he used to do. Winning the case wouldn't have made things better, but it would have made sure these doctors couldn't do the same thing to anyone else." Casey looked back down at her hands, breathing slightly faster.

George shot a sympathetic look to his stepdaughter. He clasped Nora's hand and continued, feeling guilty for what he was going to reveal next.

"We lost the case. We lost it on a technicality. One of the expert witnesses refused to answer our letters or phone calls. The judge had to strike him from all the records. Without him, we didn't stand a chance. All that work, everything the McDonalds had gone through was for nothing. I've never been so upset with losing at case before." George shook his head, looking as if her were going to cry himself.

Nora wiped her tears away and picked up the story.

"Dennis couldn't handle it. He was so angry that he couldn't do anything he used to do. He couldn't work anymore. We became a single income household. I had to work more and I didn't get to see the girls much any more. Things were tense. I just didn't know how bad he was taking it. I came home one night to see Casey sitting on the front steps, clutching a piece of paper in her hands. It was a receipt for a plane ticket. The ticket was one way, to the States. I asked her where she got it and she told me it was left in the printer. I knew as soon as she said that, Dennis had left. He couldn't deal with not being able to do the stuff he used to do so he left. He didn't even leave a note. I pulled Casey inside and fixed her and Lizzie a light dinner. None of us ate, we just sat there. Finally I sent them to bed. A few weeks later, a knock sounded at the door. It was Dennis. He looked so out of it, I couldn't be angry with him. When he came back, I thought things were going to be ok. He was back and we would deal as a family."

Nora began to cry again, although this time she did not do it quietly. Lizzie stood up and went to her mother. Nora gathered Lizzie in her arms, holding her close, both sets of shoulders shaking.

Derek and Edwin glanced around. It seemed like things had been turning around, what happened. Casey began speaking, quietly, almost to herself.

"I was walking home from school when I heard it. I had just reached the front door when it sounded. It was so loud, like a clap of thunder. But it came from inside the house. That's when I knew it. I ran inside and threw my books down. Running to my dad's office, I threw the door open. There was my dad, on the floor, bleeding; a gun was lying right next to him. He had shot himself in the heart. I threw myself next to him, placing my hands on his chest, trying to stop the bleeding. He was still alive, I needed to call 911. I went to grab the phone when I heard him say my name. I started crying, telling him that he was going to be ok. He told me he loved me and that I needed to be good. He needed me to take care of my sister and my mom. I needed to be strong. I tried to tell him that he would be alright, that I would do anything he wanted if he just held on. I tried to tell him that I grew up when the doctor in the hospital told me if I didn't let my dad go, that he would die. I told him I would be good and that I would clean the house and take care of everyone. I was with him when he took his last breath."

Casey looked up. She looked at the three Venturi men and her mom and sister.

"With that last breath, he took his life and my childhood. I haven't really cried since, unless it is on this day. This is the anniversary of when he was dead for those eleven minutes, because the way I see it, we never got him back from that. The man who returned home to us, the man who left us, the man who shot himself was not my father. It was just someone who looked like him. My father died in those eleven minutes, at the hands of the doctors. And I grew up. In those eleven minutes, my whole life changed. Gone was the carefree little girl who trusted and believed. I died the day he did." Casey stood up and began walking towards the door. She turned around and looked at her mother and Lizzie.

"So now you know how I feel about it. I know I have always told you that I was fine. I lied. I haven't been fine for quiet some time. I know you always wondered why I never cried at his funeral, well that's why. I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to stop."

Looking at Derek, she continued. "That's why I throw myself into school. It was the only way I could escape what happened. I don't know any other way. That's why I am the way I am. I've learned you can't trust people who say they love you and that they want to help you. Because people hurt you. People leave. They make you promise to do things that they can't possibly do. I mean, how many little girls are forced to take care of their mothers and sisters while their father is killed by doctors? I shouldn't have been forced to grow up that fast. I should have had my childhood."

Casey gave her mother and sister a last glance before turning away from them and saying, "At least I still care about him. It may seriously impair my functioning, but at least I loved him enough to continue to miss him."

With that, Casey walked out the door. Her footsteps could be heard going up the stairs. Derek looked around at the people sitting in the kitchen; everyone looked so lost and confused. The five people sat around the kitchen table in silence, each lost in their own thoughts.


	13. Chapter 13

So there you guys have it. There's the big secret. Thank you all so much for your reviews. Honestly, I thought I didn't do that well with the chapter...it was hard for me. Thank you guys for your kind reviews and sympathy. It made it a lot easier, I was pretty nervous. To answer some questions that were posted, yes this story is based on events that have happened in my life. But, like a movie that has been made off a real event, things have been changed. In my life, what happened to Dennis happened to my mom. The malpractice and everything that the doctor's did with the lies and the cover-ups really happened; I left out a lot of the detail because it's way too long. We did have a law-suit and we did lose on the technicality that I described; although unlike in the story, the law-suit lasted 10 years (I shortened it up a great deal). Fortunately, unlike Dennis, my mother didn't kill herself; although she did leave for a while and she did attempt. Thankfully, she didn't. All the events Casey described with her dad asking her to take care of everyone and some future events that I will mention in the next few chapters have happened.

So that's my story in a very very small nutshell, lol. To make up for the sadness for the last chapter (people said they cried, oops!), here is some Dasey...with a short cliffie. I know it's not the longest, but I've been super busy with school. Even though the last chapter was difficult to write and even more difficult to post on the net, I am glad you guys enjoyed it. I honestly thought I had written it horribly. Anyways, here is the next chapter. Even though the reveal has happened, there is still some drama and some Dasey on the way, so keep reviewing because that is what makes me update!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own LWD

THE NEXT MORNING:

Casey was sitting on her bed, homework spread out in front of her. She sat tapping her pen, not really paying attention, her eyes unfocused. All of the sudden there was a knock on the door. The door edged open, and Derek walked in, looking uneasy. He gave her a sheepish smile, hands in his pockets.

"Hey, Case. What are you doing?" His eyes conveyed the concern his voice did not. Casey gave him a look of discontent. She sighed and moved her feet, allowing Derek to sit at the foot of her bed.

"What do you want Derek?"

"Nothing, can't I just come in and see what you're doing?"

Casey raised an eyebrow and looked at Derek. "No, Derek. You can't. You have never come in my room to see what I'm doing before. And you aren't going to start now. I don't want your pity. I don't need you feeling sorry for me now that you've learned something about my past." Casey looked back down at her homework. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have a lot of homework I need to get done."

Derek reached over and closed Casey's book. "Look, Casey. It's Friday. We don't have school today because of the teacher work day. You have all Saturday and Sunday to work on your homework. And you're wrong. I don't pity you, at all. The situation, your past, yea, ok, it sucks. It sucks big time. I want to be able to tell you it's going to be alright one day and that I want to help you forget about it and make it better; I'm not going to. I know you don't want to hear it; I know you don't believe it. I'm simply here to see what you were doing. I'm not going to ask you if you're ok, because I know you're not. I would be stupid to believe you when you say you're fine. I know enough not to push you right now."

Casey was stunned. Derek was never this understanding or compassionate towards her. Yet here he was being both. Not only that, he was being more compassionate than other people. He was understanding what she needed and what she wanted, even though he didn't agree with it. Casey felt tears spring to her eyes; she shut her eyes briefly and willed the tears to go away. When she opened them, she looked back at Derek, gratitude clearly written over her face. Derek smiled at her, a real heartwarming smile; he reached up and pushed some of her hair out of her face, tucking it behind her ear.

"You've got some pen on your cheek, Case." He ran his thumb over where the ink was a few times, each time increasing the pressure slightly. Derek gave her a smirk and said "There you go." Derek stood and walked to the door.

"Derek, wait." Casey said. She bit her lip and looked half surprised that she called out to him; Derek turned around.


	14. Chapter 14

Hey you guys. I'm glad you all enjoyed the cliffie :) lol. I felt bad so I decided to upload another chapter...complete with another cliffie :) I know, I know. I'm horrible. But I want you guys to keep reading and reviewing! So here is another chapter, let me know what you think!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own LWD :(

"Um, well, I was thinking about going for a walk later, in about an hour or so. If you want to come or, I mean, if you're not doing anything…" Casey asked uneasily.

Derek smiled at her rambling. "Yea, I'm not doing anything. Just let me know when you're ready." Derek turned around and walked out of the room, making sure to close the door. Casey stared at the door, a small smile gracing her lips; she shook her head and went back to attempting to do her homework.

Out in the hall Derek pulled out his cell phone from his pocket; he dialed a number quickly.

"Hey, Sam, it's me. I'm not going to be able to make it tonight. Yes, I know it's a big party. I know there are going to be a lot of girls there. Yea, I know what I'm going to miss. Sam, listen, I got to go. Have fun tonight, man." Derek flipped his phone shut and walked to his room.

1 HOUR LATER

Casey nervously walks to Derek's door. She raises her hand to knock, but never puts her fist to the door. Casey shook her head, _What am I doing?_ She turned around to return to her room when she hears Derek's door open.

"Casey, are you ready to go?"

Casey whirled around to see Derek standing in his doorway, shrugging into his leather jacket.

"Uh, yea. Yes. Let's go." Casey turned around and walked down the stairs. She put on her jacket and the two of them walked towards the door. Casey reached to open the door, but Derek beat her to it; he held it open for her and the two went outside.

15 MINUTES LATER

"So, where exactly are we going?" Derek asked, interrupting the silence that had persisted since they left the house. Casey looked up from the ground and looked around.

"It seems like we're headed for the park. Is that ok?"

Derek nodded, "Yea, that's fine. I don't care. I'm just here to keep you company."

Casey nodded her head and shivered slightly; Derek noticed her shivering. He quickly reached underneath the collar of his jacket and pulled off his scarf; stopping her, he wrapped it around her neck, making sure to secure it and angle it for maximum warmth. Once they started moving again, Casey smiled a small smile; it was hidden behind the scarf. She took a deep breath; the smell of Derek mixing with the crisp cold air was making her lightheaded.

Once they reached the park, Casey automatically headed towards the pond. Derek took note of this.

"Do you usually go to the pond when you go out for a walk?"

Casey looked at the pond and back at Derek. "I guess so. Being near the water, even if it's frozen over like now, always helps me relax. It's therapeutic. Why? Are you surprised?"

Derek shrugged. "I guess. I mean, I've always thought you would head into the trees and sit on one of the benches there. I always head towards the water; it surprised me that you did to."

"So you think of where I go on my walks?" Casey teased, bumping her shoulder into his. "Well, you're partly right. I do head into the trees if it's too crowded near the water." The two of them fell into silence once more; they walked towards a bench swing near the pond. Casey sat first, curling her legs towards her, resting her chin on her knees. Derek sat down next to her and gave the swing a slight push with his legs.

They just sat and swung in silence. Derek was beginning to lose track of time; he had no idea how long they had been out. They didn't talk, but the silence wasn't uncomfortable or overwhelming. It was easy; it was welcoming. Surprisingly, he was enjoying just sitting with Casey. He looked down at her to see if she was as at ease as he was.

She wasn't. She was looking inside herself again, obviously not liking what she saw.

"Want to know the worst part of what happened?"

Derek blinked; he was not expecting her to bring it up. He didn't say anything; he just waited.

"The worst thing out of everything is something I haven't even told mom or Liz. I can barely even think it. I've never said it aloud to myself, much less to anyone else."

Derek waited, still not saying anything.


	15. Chapter 15

So, I'm sorry for the cliffie last time. I hope this chapter makes up for it! No cliffie this time :) Anyways, please let me know what you think!!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own LWD!

"I hate him. I hate him so much for leaving, for letting it happen. I hate him for not being strong enough to stop it, for not being strong enough to stay around. I hate him for leaving me to take care of my mom and of my sister. I know I was mature for my age, but I was still only 10. I hate him so much, Derek. And then I hate myself for feeling that way," Tears started to silently fall down Casey's face. She spoke with so much anguish and guilt that Derek felt ill. He just watched, wanting to pull her into his arms and soothe her pain, knowing that she needed to say this. She needed to get it out; if he tried to touch her she would just close off.

"I hate myself for hating him. It's not his fault; I know that. I feel so guilty because I know he blamed himself. I always tried to tell him that it wasn't his fault. I never believed it was until he pulled the trigger. When he died in the study, when he took that last breath, I hated him. I hated him with every fiber of my being. And I felt so bad. Logically, I know it wasn't his fault. Emotionally…mentally…those are two different stories. I feel so lost. I feel like that 10 year old girl, waiting for her Daddy to be wheeled back into the room. I know he's never coming back; but inside I feel like a 10 year old, forever waiting for him to come back. I feel so selfish for hating him. He didn't ask for what happened; he was as much a victim as I am. I just can't help being so angry with him. I can't help but hate him; I can't help but hate myself."

Casey finally stopped speaking; she just cried. Derek watched as sobs wracked her frame, the swing moving periodically with the strengths of her sobs. Derek watched until he just couldn't take it anymore; he pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her. Casey continued to cry into Derek's chest as he rubbed his hands in soothing motions down her back. He gently kissed her head and spoke into her hair.

"Shhh, Case. It's alright to feel that way. When everything happened you were a little girl and while you were mature, I guess people just forgot that you were only 10. No one should have to go through that. Don't hate yourself for being angry; you should be angry. I would be more worried if you were fine with everything."

Derek wanted say something else, anything else. Yet Casey was crying so hard, he didn't even think she heard him. Derek tightened his arms around her, making a shushing noise and rubbing her back. Casey's sobs slowly stilled as Derek held her; she stayed in his arms for about another 15 minutes. Casey slowly rearranged herself to look up at Derek and not leave his arms.

Casey looked guiltily into his face. "I'm sorry. I don't know where all that came from. You don't need to hear all this and I know the whole crying thing really gets to you, I'm sorry."

Derek wiped the remaining tears from her face and looked down at her. "Casey, it's alright. You needed to let that out; you needed to cry. I get it, I do. And you're right; I can't deal with the crying. I hate it when girls cry, especially when it's you…or Marti...but I know you needed to. So it's alright, in fact it's better than alright. It's great that you cried!"

After a beat of silence, Casey and Derek both made faces.

"That came out differently than in my head." Derek said with a smirk.

Casey chuckled, "You're a dork."

Derek smiled and gave her a little squeeze. "Maybe, but that's all part of my charm."

Casey raised an eyebrow and rolled her eyes. "Whatever, Mr. Charismatic. Are you ready to head back? I'm sure you have plans for tonight. Besides, I'm a little cold."

Derek nodded and lifted his arms from around her; he stood up and offered his hand to her, helping her up. "If you're ready, I'm ready. And no on the plans, I'm a free agent; I'm all yours. You can do what you like to me." Derek said, the innuendo plainly heard in his voice and obviously shown on his face via a smirk.

Casey shoved him playfully. "You really are a strange one, Derek Venturi. Let's go home."

Derek and Casey walked home; both were relatively silent with a random quip and a laugh in response thrown in every now and then.


	16. Chapter 16

Hey guys! Sorry it took me a few days! I am still slammed with homework and papers. Add to that usual chaos a new job and the fact my closet shelf fell out of the wall, leading to plaster covered clothes strewn across the floor...let's just say the environment and timing wasn't conducive to writing :) Anyways, here's another chapter! I hope you like it! Please, let me know what you think! I love reading reviews! Keep the coming!!!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own LWD. But I am putting Michael Seater on my wish list :)

A FEW WEEKS LATER:

"Hey Casey! What are your plans for spring break?" Emily asked as Casey shut her locker. The girls began walking home from school; today was the last day of school for a week. Casey looked at Emily, with a sad look on her face.

"Mourning the lack of school. Seriously, Em, a week off? Do you know how much we could learn in a week? Not to mention the lack of stimulation for our brains. There have been studies-"

Emily laughed and interrupted her. "Casey! Calm down! You can use a week off," Casey looked at Emily in disbelief before Emily continued. "Just think of all the homework you can do."

Casey paused, a bright smile spread over her face. She slung an arm over Emily's shoulder. "This is why I love you, Em. You always look on the bright side!"

The girls laughed and continued on their way home.

AT HOME

Case walked in the house, shutting the door she looked around to see what was going on at home. No one was in the living room; she heard some noise from the kitchen and went into it. She saw Derek at the island, pouring the last of the chip crumbs into his mouth. He raised his eyes when she came in. Derek made some sound, which she assumed was "Hi Casey;" although it was hard to tell considering he was still chewing on chip crumbs. Casey smiled at him and walked to the refrigerator; she grabbed the lemonade and poured herself a glass.

"So Case, what are your plans for the wonderful spring break ahead?" Derek asked casually, sitting on a stool.

Casey playfully stuck out her bottom lip in a pout, causing Derek to shift in his stool and look down at his hands.

"Well, I was upset about it at first, a whole week without school? But then Emily talked me through it. She reminded me that I could use that week to get ahead of my homework. I also figured I could start researching internships and stuff…"

Derek shook his head. "Casey, Casey, Casey, don't you know spring break is supposed to be fun?

Casey looked shocked. "Derek, it is fun! That sense of accomplishment that you get when you complete something and you know you did it right is fun! I know fun; just because you…and Emily…and Paul…and everyone else thinks I don't, doesn't make it true."

Derek rolled his eyes. "Yea, whatever. So, speaking of Paul, have you spoken to him lately?"

Casey looked up from her backpack, she had pulled it up to get some paper to write a detailed schedule of her homework for the upcoming week. She was a little surprised, Derek has never asked about Paul.

"Um, I did last week, I believe. I was trying to plan what to write for a personal statement essay I need to do, so I was asking his advice. Why?" Casey asked suspiciously. Yes, she and Derek have been getting along, but there were still times when she found it hard to fully trust him.

Derek shrugged, looking anywhere but at her. "No reason. I've just gone to see him a few times, that's all."

Casey was floored. Derek hated to talk to anyone about his feelings and he had always made fun of her for going. Suddenly, Casey had a feeling, a very bad feeling.

"What about Derek?" Casey asked slowly, dreading the answer.


	17. Chapter 17

Hey guys! Here's another chapter! I know the cliffie last time wasn't that big, in fact a lot of you have probably already guessed the answer to it. As much as I hate to say it, the story is winding down. It's probably going to be a few more chapters, though I'm not sure the exact number. I don't want to drag anything out and also I am getting slammed with school and work stuff, which leads to less time to write and update. But it's not the end yet, so don't fret :) Enjoy this chapter! Please review! It's wonderful to read!!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own LWD...but Mikey in those podcasts...I want to own him :) lol

When Derek didn't answer, she repeated herself.

Derek looked up into her eyes. He looked uneasy, anticipating her to blow up. Derek still remained silent. Casey walked over to Derek; she stood straight in front of him, yet he still didn't say anything.

"Derek." Casey said with firmly, yet Derek could hear a hint of vulnerability and uncertainty creep into her voice. She was afraid, he could tell; somehow she knew what he talked to Paul about, without him saying a word.

"You. I went to Paul to talk about you." Derek muttered, almost under his breath. Casey shut her eyes tightly and took a deep breath, trying to slow her racing heart. She took a step back from Derek; once she was farther away she opened her eyes.

"What did you two talk about? What about me?"

Derek grimaced at the hurt in her voice. He didn't answer her; instead he asked her a question that caught Casey by surprise.

"Have you been to his grave, Casey? I mean, after the funeral was over, have you gone back?"

Casey stumbled back, she grasped onto the counter to prevent herself from falling. She slowly sank on to a stool. She put her hands on her forehead and pushed upward, as if trying to push the information into her head. She didn't look at Derek.

"No. Does it really matter? It's not like going there is going to change anything. It's not going to bring him back."

Derek walked over and sat next to Casey, he put a hand on her back and began rubbing soothing circles.

"No, it's not going to bring him back. But it might help bring you closure, to help you get over it and move on." Before Derek could say or do anything, he felt himself being pushed away; he grabbed onto the counter, if it weren't for his fast reflexes he would have fallen to the ground. He looked up at a now standing Casey.

"Get over it? Move on? I don't need to get over it and move on! Damnit, Derek! The only reason why I told you anything is because you were supposed to stay you. You weren't supposed to try and help. There is no help! I can't believe you went to Paul and told him all of this. I trusted you, Derek. Why did you do that? I thought we were getting along now, I thought things were going good. Was it all a trick, a prank to get be to trust you…to feel something for you and then just throw it back in my face? What's next? A victory dance as you sing 'na na na na nah?'"

Casey turned around and went to run upstairs. Derek was not going to let her get away that easily; he sprinted after her. Casey was halfway up the stairs when Derek caught her arm. Derek pulled her around to face him; Casey struggled against him as he grabbed both her arms and pulled her against him.

"You want to know why I did it? I did it for you, Casey. I did it for you. I hated seeing you go through that much pain, even if it's only a couple of days a year. I want you to get better; I don't want you to feel that. Seeing you like that, Casey, I don't even know how to begin to describe how it felt. It hurt me to see you in that much pain. That's why I did it."

Derek released her arms and took a step back. Casey stood there not saying a word. Derek leaned back against the wall and sank down to the steps and sat down. Derek looked up at Casey.

"Look, Case, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to betray you or whatever. I thought I was doing the right thing. All I wanted to do is to make everything better for you. I know you find that hard to believe, but it's the truth."

Casey sat down a few steps above Derek; she gave him a look.


	18. Chapter 18

Another quick one :) I'm taking a break from doing some homework to update. I'm glad you guys are liking it, please keep reviewing! The story is winding down. I'm kinda sad because this is the longest story I've written, my first multi-chapter fic; I have to admit I was really nervous about it. Alas, all things must come to an end...but it isn't over yet :)

DISCLAIMER: Don't own it :(

"I get it, Derek, I do. You just wanted to help. I only wish you would have told me about it. It's really not your story to tell. I haven't told anyone and I'm not planning to tell anyone. It's something that's in my past; something that I am just not ready to put behind me. Do you understand that? At this point in my life, I don't want to move on from it. Embracing my anger and my…my guilt is the only way I'm able to function. Yea, it may not be the healthiest way, but it's my way. It's the only thing I know how to do." She looked down at the floor, ashamed.

Derek looked up at Casey, confusion clearly evident in his eyes.

"Casey, you don't need to feel guilty for being angry. I told you this before, at the park. It's not your fault. You were 10 when this all happened, you can't feel guilty for being angry. I don't understand why you feel guilty. I mean, I get what you are saying…but I don't understand it."

Casey looked back up at Derek, her eyes wide and filled with tears.

"I don't understand it either, Derek. I wish I did, but I don't. I just am." Casey whispered, the tears slowly beginning to fall. Casey stood up and walked to her room; Derek continued sitting on the steps, long after he heard her bedroom door close quietly.

THE NEXT DAY

Casey walked downstairs around 9:30 Saturday morning. The day was cold and gray; she had checked the weather report online; there was an 80 chance of rain. Walking into the kitchen, Casey spotted a note on the counter, it was from her mom. She and George had taken Lizzie, Edwin, and Marti to breakfast and then they were going to go to a movie. Casey placed the note back on the countertop and began to make a pot of coffee. While the coffee was brewing, Casey leaned against the sink with her eyes closed. She wished she could shake out of this funk she was in since yesterday. All she wanted was to curl up in someone's arms and have them hold her. In the past, she would go to her dad. However, once her dad died, she had managed to quell that desire. Casey shook her head, as if to attempt to erase this silly feeling; she tightened her sweater around herself, suddenly chilled. She walked over and pulled out a mug, her coffee was almost done. Before she walked away from the mugs, she pulled out another one. Casey could hear Derek on the stairs, clomping down loudly, like always. She walked over to the coffee pot and poured two cups of coffee. Casey added the milk and sugar just like she liked it to one and added it like Derek liked it to the other. Turning around she handed the mug to Derek, who gratefully took it and sat at the table. Casey still stood, slowly sipping her coffee. The two drank their coffee in silence.

Derek looked at Casey, who was still sipping her coffee silently.

"Look, Case. I'm sorry about yesterday-" Derek began at the same time as Casey who said, "Derek, can I ask you something?"

They each gave the other a little smile. Derek gestured to Casey to continue.

Casey nodded and looked down, not wanting to meet his eyes. "Derek, can you do something for me and not make fun of me for it? It's a hard thing for me to say and I don't want to regret it. So can you just do something for me and not hold it against me?"

Derek stood up and walked to Casey. He took the coffee mug out of her hand and placed it on the counter. Derek lifted Casey's chin with two fingers to look into her eyes.

"Anything."

Casey's breath caught, involuntarily. She looked into Derek's eyes before she asked him her favor.


	19. Chapter 19

Hey everyone! The story is almost done, I am thinking that this will be the second to last chapter, so I do hope you enjoyed it. Please review and let me know what you think!!

DISCLAIMER: Don't own LWD :(

"Can you just hold me? I just need a hug. I know that seems weak and silly, but I really need one. I just feel so guilty and empty and-"

Before Casey could finish, Derek had grabbed her. He wrapped his arms around her as she buried her face into his neck. Derek could feel her shaking, her breath quick and hot on his neck; he held her even closer. Their bodies seem to mold together as one, a perfect fit, Derek noted. There was nothing awkward about her; it felt as if he had found a piece of himself that he didn't even know had been missing. _It feels so right having her in my arms_ Derek thought to himself. He leaned his cheek on top of Casey's head; he breathed deeply, inhaling the clean scent of her hair and closed his eyes.

Once in Derek's arms, Casey closed her eyes. She shook with silent sobs; she had never thought the day would come where she could ask someone to help her and they would. Much to her surprise it was Derek; what surprised Casey even more is that she didn't mind that it was Derek helping her; in fact she wanted it to be him. Casey felt his arms tighten around her, as if trying to protect her from the world; she felt Derek pull her closer. They fit together so perfectly, Casey tightened her arms around Derek's waist, not planning to let go until she had to.

Time passed; however, neither Casey nor Derek could say for certain how much. Casey lifted her head from Derek's neck and took a slight step back, making sure to still be in the comfort of Derek's arms. Derek looked down into Casey's eyes, both staring at each other not saying a word. Derek's eyes flickered down to Casey's lips and then back up to her eyes; her breath caught. Ever so slowly the pair leaned into one another, lips so close if they even twitched their lips would brush. After what seemed like an eternity their lips connected.

Casey gasped at the feeling, slightly opening her mouth. She had kissed guys before, but none of even compared to this. Casey had always thought the fireworks and ringing bells were just nonsense created by the movies; however, her mind quickly changed as she kissed Derek. He slid his tongue through her parted lips and explored every crevice. Casey knees weakened as she felt him smirk against her and she held on to Derek, whether to keep herself standing or to pull him closer, she still doesn't know. Casey felt everything Derek was feeling…confusion, desire, need. Derek may be a great liar, but she felt every part of him as she kissed him; it was like she could see inside his mind, heart, and soul. It wasn't a gentle kiss; it was raw, savage, passion in its truest form. The kiss made her feel, made her whole.

Derek had kissed many girls; he knew it, everyone knew it. However, even with all the girls he had been with, not one of them made him feel like Casey did. She responded to him in a way he didn't even realize he was missing, or in a way he needed. Derek had no idea why he was doing this, other than to help her, to make her feel something, anything, other than this guilt and emptiness. Derek poured everything he could into that kiss, showing her what he couldn't put into words.

They broke apart, each panting heavily. Derek leaned his forehead on Casey's, who still hadn't opened her eyes. Derek grinned and kissed Casey on the nose. She opened her eyes, which Derek could see were clouded. Suddenly, fear filled Casey's eyes. She jerked back, out of Derek's arms.


	20. Chapter 20

Hey everyone! So here it is, the last chapter :( It's bittersweet for me. For one, I don't have to keep reliving old memories for it...yet it was strangely theraputic. Thank you all so much for reading and reviewing. Thanks for all your kind words; you all are truly amazing!

Since this is the last chapter, give the reviews all you got! Let me know what you liked, what you didn't like. What could be better, what was annoying, what was touching, the strongest and weakest points. I want to hear all your thoughts!

Anyways, I hope you all have enjoyed it. And as soon as inspiration strikes, look for another story (whether it will be a one shot or a multi-chapter, I couldn't begin to tell you ).

DISCLAIMER: I don't own LWD...I want Mikey Seater, I put him on my holiday list :)

"Oh, god. What did we just do? What did I just do? No, what did you do? Why did you do that?" Casey said frantically as she began to pace around.

Derek was stunned. "What did I do? Me? Sorry to burst your martyring bubble, Princess, but there were two of us involved in that kiss."

Casey scoffed, "Yes, but I didn't know what I was doing. I was vulnerable…and you took advantage of that! Besides, it's not like I kissed you back…"

Derek rolled his eyes. "Don't even begin to pull that crap Casey. We were both active participants in this little event. If anything, you're the one who is to blame."

"Me? Why me?" Casey asked, momentarily stilling her pacing.

Derek smirked. "Because you're supposed to be the smart one. I'm the dumb one. Remember? You're usually so quick to remind me of that too." Derek dodged the stuffed animal Casey launched at his head.

"Derek, shut up. What just happened can never happen again." Casey said, looking straight at Derek.

Derek gave a half grin. "What, you'll never throw a stuffed animal at my head again? Why, Casey, you're so kind."

Casey yelled out in frustration. "No, Derek! I will continue to throw stuffed animals at your head. What can't happen is kissing. Kissing and us. It can't happen, not again. Not ever."

Derek sat down on Casey's bed; crossing his arms behind his head, he leaned back against the headboard. Rolling his eyes and giving Casey a smile, Derek said,

"Sure, whatever you say Case. But there's just one thing. I quite enjoyed this little activity, and I know you did to. I'm just not seeing the point in stopping. So stop freaking out and let's rinse and repeat."

Casey grabbed the bottle of water she had on her desk from earlier; she uncapped it and threw the contents on Derek. "I'll show you rinse. Now you can repeat these words to yourself. Never again." Casey tossed the empty bottle into the trash and walked out of the room, leaving Derek sputtering and dripping onto her bed.

A FEW HOURS LATER

Derek was pacing around the house. When Casey had walked out of the room earlier, she had left the house and hadn't been back since. Derek had a few guesses on where she could be, but he didn't want to leave in case she really did want to be alone.

"Argh! Whatever, if she wants to be alone, she can be alone with me!" Derek said, grabbing his leather jacket and walking out the door. Derek began walking to the park where he and Casey had walked previously. Once he got there, he saw her sitting down near the water, dangling her feet off the pier. Derek walked up and sat down besides her silently. He slipped his hand into hers, giving it a gentle squeeze.

Casey sighed. The wind had picked up and was whipping her hair around. She was watching the ripples travel across the lake. She kicked her feet around in the air, casually nudging Derek's.

"Will you go with me to the cemetery?"

Derek intertwined the fingers and helped her stand up.

"Of course."

The two began to walk back to the house to get the car. Neither said a word and neither let go of the others hand.

AT THE CEMETERY:

Casey knew where her dad was buried based on memory alone. She hadn't forgotten anything about that day. They reached the grave site and just stood there. Casey let go of Derek's hand and took a tentative step closer to the marker.

"Hi Dad," Casey began. "It's me, Casey. I know I haven't been here since you first came…I'm sorry."

Casey threw herself on the ground; she buried her face in her hands and cried.

"I'm so sorry, Daddy. I'm sorry I haven't been able to move on. I'm sorry I haven't been able to be happy. I just miss you so much. Why did you have to leave? Why? I want you to come home. Nothing has been the same since you left."

Casey cried for a while longer. She managed to calm herself slightly when she felt Derek come up closer to her and kneel.

"Hello Mr. McDonald. I'm Casey's step-brother, Derek. I've heard a lot about you. You seem like you were a cool guy. I just wanted to let you know some things about Casey. She is one of the strongest people I have ever known. She's amazing. She has a great heart and always puts others before herself. She's beautiful and smart. She's also as stubborn as a mule, though I am sure you remember that. The thing is… Casey has had it rough since you died. She hasn't let herself deal with it. I've been trying to help her, but I don't know how much more I can do unless she lets me. See, somewhere within the time I've known Casey, my opinion of her has evolved from mild amusement and tremendous annoyance, to one of awe and love. Some time between her yelling at me at lunch back in February to her throwing the contents of a water bottle at me a few hours ago, I realized she is everything I want in a girl. She's smart; she keeps me on my toes. She thinks for herself. She's gorgeous and talented and she doesn't know it. She has all these amazing qualities, yet she never notices them. I just want to let you know that she is unique and special, there is no one else like her…and I want to help her. I don't want her to hurt this much. I want her to live and to experience the world; I want her to be happy. And I am sure you do to. So, that's all I wanted to say…"

Derek looked at his watch and turned to Casey. "You know we've been at the cemetery for eleven minutes…a set of eleven minutes has changed your life before; maybe it's time for a new set to cause another change." Derek went to stand and turn around but stopped when Casey grabbed his arm. She trailed her fingers down his arm and held his hand.

"Dad, that was Derek, as you know. I've told him things that I haven't even told Mom or Lizzie. He gets me, dad. For some reason he sees me, broken pieces and all, and still wants me. He doesn't treat me like I'm going to shatter. He let's me scream and cry…and throw water bottles on him. He doesn't make me feel bad for feeling the way I do; he makes me see that it's ok. And yea, ok, he's a jackass…but he wants me to be happy; I want to be happy. And I think I am finally realizing that I won't be unless I let my anger and my guilt go. I know that it's not going to be an overnight process. It's going to take a while, but I'm ready. I'm ready to live, for me…for you. I know you would want me to and I'm going to try, Daddy. I really will. I love you. So much. Goodbye, Daddy. I think I will be back soon; I won't say when, because I don't know…but I will be."

Casey stood up, pulling Derek with her. Derek looked at her, if it was possible, she looked lighter, as if she had let go of some big weight. Her eyes sparkled as Derek had never seen before. Casey bit her lip and asked shyly,

"Derek, did you mean all that?"

Derek smiled softly and stroked her cheek.

"Every word. Especially the part where you are as stubborn as a mule."

Casey grinned and launched herself into Derek's arms, laughing. Derek joined her and spun her around. Derek put her down and Casey made sure her arms were wrapped around his neck.

"Jackass."

Derek smirked and captured her lips. Casey giggled against his lips, quickly getting lost in the feelings.

Their kiss promised many things; a future full of happiness and fun, fights and make up, and love. Most definitely love. Eleven minutes can change a life, that's something Casey keeps being taught. The first set of eleven minutes almost killed her; the second set is setting her free to live, laugh, and love…she was curious to know what the next set of eleven minutes would bring.


End file.
